I know this may come as a shock to you, but all of the stay at home orders and the social distancing haven't changed my life my much. I Couldn't go much of anywhere or do anything before this started. So I have not really noticed a difference in my day to day non-activities, and many people are probably like me, and their Lives haven't changed much either.
To those of you you who are always on the go and suddenly had to stop you might just contemplate and remind yourself that there are people who must live like this all the time, and then you can appreciate what you can do once this has passed.
I did not write a single word in March, because I had something else on my mind. I was thinking about my beautiful granddaughter whose birthday was in March she was on my mind this March more than most, and I am not sure why, but it was so. I wonder what she would look like, what she would be doing, and I know she would be a papa's girl. I did not know that you could love a human being that lived only nine days like I Loved Halli. I can remember rubbing her feet as my wife held her knowing that Trisomy18 had the upper hand and it would not be long and she would wrapped up safely in the arms of my saviour. I feel blessed to have had those nine days with her, and I would not trade those for anything "Precious Memories" is the truth! I am thankful that God chose to give me a good memory I can remember things from my childhood that my parents or other siblings do.
I go out to her grave site often to visit, yes I know she is not there, but it is for me. I talk to her as if she where there. I guess people deal with death differently. one is not wrong or right it is just the difference in how we deal with it. I can't quite put into words what I have felt or am feeling this month, but those of you who have lost a child or Grandchild probably do not know exactly what you are thinking either. Sometimes things Just roll around in my head and I cannot put them into words.
There are times I feel alone in this struggle, and times I am not sure I can make it, but then again there are people who have it worse than I do. Life is sometimes just hard, and we know it will be, but when it happens we are not ready. We think somewhere in the back of our heads that we will exempt from the trials and struggles of this life, and to be honest there are many time I grow weary of this life, but don't we all at one point or another? we are all human we all have emotions no matter what colour or what background from which you come.
I know that I am not alone, and that there are people who care I just have days and months like this one that I need to reflect. Not say much just reflect.
As for my health I go to the Doctor on the 21st of April to discuss the new DBS system that they have developed for Dystonia patients, if they are still seeing patients that is, since I am a high risk person they do not want me going much of anywhere.
I do no think I have washed my hands so much my entire life than I have the past couple of weeks. It seems every five minutes my wife is telling me to go wash my hands, and all I have been doing is not much of anything, but like a good husband I obey:-)
This quarantine will pass and everyone will go back to there normal lives, or what they consider normal, but just remember that there are those whose lives will still be quarantined. Do not forget about those. I know I would have had I not had this disease. If you have your health that the Lord for it and stay safe. You are never promised tomorrow just enjoy today even if it is quarantined.